It’s a little wild to look back at my yearly review for 2021 and consider how completely everything has changed since then. I published that post on January 3, and I didn’t take a pregnancy test to let us know Milo was on the way until four days later.
His arrival and the nine months leading up to it completely turned my world upside down, which is why I’m excited to reflect on 2022, set goals for 2023, and settle into our new normal as a family of three (plus Zoey).
Mantra for 2023
Sometimes I choose a word to guide me throughout the year. This time, only a phrase will do to fully encompass what I’m going for.
About three days before posting this, I had planned for an entirely different mantra. It was going to be “Find the wonder,” and I’d written a beautiful little paragraph about how watching Milo discover all the new things about being alive had inspired me to want the same for myself.
That’s all well and good, and maybe 2024 will be my year for wonder. What I really need in 2023 is to give myself permission to ask for help.
Motherhood is hard. It’s hard on me mentally, physically, and emotionally. It’s hard on my relationship. We’ve been two people for 17+ years and are now having to figure out how to add a third. It’s hard on all the different aspects of my life, from work to my friendships to the little things that bring me joy and make me feel like myself.
These are just some of the reasons why it’s imperative that I find peace with needing help.
As an oldest daughter, asking for help is about the hardest thing I can imagine doing. It feels like the antithesis of who I am.
I’m supposed to be independent. To not only know how to do it all but know how to fit it all into the 24 hours I get every day. It’s a core part of my personality and something that my professional coach and I were working on even before my maternity leave began.
Ever since Milo arrived, though, I’ve taken on this burden of motherhood that tells me I shouldn’t need to ask for help. As if I should inherently know how to do everything related to my baby and that I should feel massive guilt for asking anyone’s assistance. I don’t know where it came from, but I’m guessing the patriarchy is to blame. It sucks.
Ask for help is this year’s mantra in the hopes that it reminds me to embrace letting other people do things for me. I’m blessed to have so many who love me in my life, and I shouldn’t turn away from their support.
My Resolutions for 2023
Last year, I was particularly bad at following through with my New Year’s resolutions. For one thing, the first trimester exhaustion really took it out of me, and I lost the motivation to do most of the things I love. Even the most important activities like reading and writing didn’t interest me when all I felt able to do was sleep.
For some of last year’s resolutions, it just wasn’t practical or sometimes even possible. For instance, while I bought a lot of my maternity clothing secondhand, it wasn’t practical to buy everything used.
With all that in mind, I’m considering 2023 as a bit of a do over for my 2022 resolutions. You’ll notice that quite a bit of them correspond to last year’s and that’s by design. Especially now that I’m a mom, I want to be intentional about jumping back into the things that I’ve always loved doing.
This year will also be a test of sorts, to see which of my priorities have changed now that there’s a tiny child to keep alive. (And he tends to be pretty high up there on the list of priorities!)
In 2023, these are the practices I plan to incorporate into my everyday life:
- Read 30 books
- Buy most of my clothing secondhand
- Write once a week in my current fiction project
- Practice yoga regularly*
- Get back into daily meditation
- Bake something new every month
- Compost at home
I wanted to cut back a bit from last year’s list, but what can I say? I’m feeling ambitious, and I also think prioritizing these practices will help me feel more like myself. And that balance will help me be a better mom.
*I’m kicking off my yoga practice for the year by taking part in Yoga With Adriene’s 30 Days of Yoga. It’s a free, at-home yoga practice that runs throughout January. I’ve done it for years and would 100% recommend it for yogis of all ages and levels of experience. It’ll be my first step back into moving my body postpartum! Check out her website to learn more.
Alright, ready for a little recap of the year on An Aspiring Heroine?
Year in Review: Blogging
Posts Published This Year: 10
Most Viewed Post from 2022: A Definitive Ranking of Bridgerton Novels
Again in 2022, the world caught Bridgerton fever, and that inspired me to finally finish the book series. I’d fallen off after the first Bridgerton craze and still had two of the seven books to finish. But once I did, I wrote this fun listicle with my own ranking of the novels. I stand by these picks, even if my opinion of Daphne and the Duke’s story might be controversial!
My Favorite Post from 2022: Five Steps to a Productive Work from Home Day
This post about setting yourself up well to work from home was partly a way to center myself for a change in my work-from-home schedule last year. I do think there’s a lot of good advice in it, though. Now that I have nearly a year of hybrid work history, I know what works well to set myself up mentally, physically, and emotionally for this new normal for many corporate employees around the world, and I believe it could also work for others.
Most Viewed Post on An Aspiring Heroine: The Seasons as Taylor Swift Albums
For the second year in a row, my post about which Taylor Swift album matches each season was the most visited on the whole blog! I honestly love that because it was such a fun post to write. As a former English major, close reading various Taylor Swift lyrics was an absolute joy! Do you agree with my choices?
In 2023, I will post at least twice each month.
Let’s be honest, okay? It’s been a hot minute since I really posted consistently. 2022 was going to be my year for jumping back in, and then getting pregnant had me reprioritizing many aspects of my life. As I work to find my new normal, I’m going to make it a priority to write more in this space.
Year in Review: Reading
Books Read: 28
Pages Read: 9,245
With a Goodreads goal of 50 books this year, only making it through 28 books is a little disappointing. On the other hand, I read 15 of those during my maternity leave alone, which just goes to show how much pregnancy affected my desire to read and how I immediately started devouring books once Milo was born.
I also DNF’ed more books than usual this year. I guess when your priorities shift, it hits home that there’s no use in slogging through books you’re not interested in.
Along with the ones I didn’t enjoy (and therefore didn’t finish), there were a number that I loved. Here are my top three from the year:
1. Anatomy: A Love Story by Dana Schwartz
This one was the first new read of the year for me, and I loved it. I honestly knew I would because Dana Schwartz also writes my favorite podcast, Noble Blood.
The story centers around Hazel, a lady living in Edinburgh who would rather become a surgeon than a lord’s wife. She enlists the help of Jack, a resurrection man, to provide her with cadavers to study once it becomes apparent that her gender will inhibit her from gaining entry to her profession of choice. Together, the two of them work to solve a mystery and stay alive in a city where it’s becoming all too easy to go missing.
The writing in this one is really lovely, and I thought all the different elements—Gothic story, murder mystery, romance—came together beautifully. The sequel, Immortality: A Love Story, comes out in February, and I’ve already preordered it!
2. Book Lovers by Emily Henry
This book was the first one I read while on maternity leave, and I just adored it. I think I even prefer it over Henry’s novel I loved last year, People We Meet On Vacation.
You can read more about why I love it in September’s Friday Finale, but basically it felt like a romance novel written for those of us who love books. (Perhaps that’s what the title is really getting at?)
3. Pride and Premeditation by Tirzah Price
It should be fairly apparent by now that I love a good adaptation of Pride and Prejudice. This YA version features budding solicitor Lizzie Bennet who learns of a society scandal involving one Charles Bingley and decides solving the case is her best chance of convincing her father that she deserves to take over his firm. Of course, rival solicitor Fitzwilliam Darcy is also on the case.
This one was cute with a good murder mystery plot and a little bit of romance, too. It earned a spot on August’s list of monthly favorites. Sense and Second-Degree Murder, featuring the Dashwood sisters, is also worth a read!
In 2023, I’d like to read 30 books.
Just being realistic here, I think it’ll be a little while until I’m back to reading 50 books a year. 30 feels like a reasonable number, though, especially considering the opportunity for late-night reading while breastfeeding! You can check out my 2023 Reading Challenge on Goodreads.
What is one thing you’re looking forward to this year? Maybe there’s a resolution or a mantra that will guide your 2023?
P.S. Check out my yearly recaps and goals from years past to get inspiration for your own resolutions: 2016, 2017, 2018, 2019, 2020, and 2021.
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